VIRIDITAS: SOUL GREENING
Interviewed by Sister Malia Dominica Wong, OP
Hawaii Catholic Herald
I love God. When I entered the convent, I freely promised God that whatever he wanted me to do, I would do it. I would not complain either, as it was my decision to follow him. Thus, with the ministerial assignments I have been given as a religious sister, I talk to God. At times, I do say, “Help me God, I cannot do that.” At other times, I may get angry and cry in front of Jesus saying, “God … you said …” (for example, x, y and z). But, God always answers my prayers. If you share the conversation with someone else, sometimes it gets scattered. Thus, just talk to God.
A positive disposition is needed to foster this type of ease of conversation with God. When I was a child, I had the thought that I wanted to be pure to be with God, and to live in the house of God. Maybe that was a calling from God to enter the convent. I know I am not perfect; only God is perfect. And as I think of myself, I know I am nothing without God. However, by doing everything for the love of God, and knowing that it is God who is doing everything that is good through me, I feel at peace. When trials and other challenges happen in life, there is always something positive to be discovered.
In one of my roles at St. Joseph School in Waipahu, I minister as the music teacher. I do not have my degree in music. But, in the course of my religious formation, we were exposed to many different fields, of which music was one. I do know music to a certain extent. However, coming in contact with the students, I know some of them know way more than I do. In the beginning, it was very hard to teach them to understand the theory of music, notation, tempo, dynamics and sounds. On top of that, the students were often very talkative.
I said, “Lord, I know you called me to this kind of ministry, so kindly help me.” As I adjusted to the culture and the classroom, I discovered that raising my voice and saying “Will you please be quiet,” was not very effective as their chatter got louder. Later, I realized that being a quiet teacher was more effective. By being quiet when the students were talkative, and just looking at them, even staring, gradually they began to realize that they were not paying attention and would say, “Sorry, Sister.” Sometimes you do not need words to say “be quiet.” The students now say that they love music.
There are three favorite sources I go to in keeping up my relationship with God. Jeremiah 1:5 reminds me, “Before I formed you in the womb I knew you; before you came to birth I consecrated you, a prophet to the nations I appointed you.” Through the prayer “Footprints in the Sand,” I am reminded especially when I feel troubled, that Jesus is there carrying me. And, lastly in 1 Corinthians 13: 4ff, sometimes when I have no patience, I remember, “Love is patient.” There are also many other talking points with God in that Scripture to keep me open to learn with the simplicity and humility needed in ministry.
Sister Mercedes Namayan is a Sister of St. Paul of Chartres from the Philippines’ Quezon Province. An educator, she arrived in Hawaii last year to work at St. Joseph School in Waipahu. She is 16 years professed.